As inspired by...

As inspired by Pablo Neruda
"Tonight I can write the saddest lines... And though these be the last lines that I write for her"
My confession:
I beg, please my mind, please forsake this woman on my mind. I left a night of all the wild and unholy to sit in my car and write this letter of despair. My fingers linger the scent of spent cigarettes, my throat is closed tight
and my head is unforgiving
a romance conceived in chaos must result in chaos
of course any rational mind would shy away
but i am
hopeless
selfish
and abstract in behavior
why is today different?
You were something different.
I am weak in the knees
My heart beats meek...
COMPLETE HONESTY
it hurt me to the hear the words:
[nonchalant
I had no expectations]
How could you mean that? I know my physical speaks otherwise,
but you speak in mannerisms as well.
Do you mean what you say?
look at me and please tell me to go away.

Sad is the woman who refuses to live in a reality
because frankly if this was all a dream then i'd rather remain asleep.
Interpret that as you will but i've grown so weary to the constant uncertainty.
this is not an issue of control, this is of consideration
I will strike this match and may all these words turn into ash
in order to follow the winds current and lie rest upon your eyes.
For my uneasy self cannot speak of it out loud.
You may condemn if you will but this for certain is how i feel.
I am left in a naked and vulnerable state but i cannot be embarrassed because
glory is what i seek and to fall short none will i ever fall
Breathe easy, stay golden.
this life is too short for mess.
embrace what is true
listen to good music
neglect what is toxic and smile more
i'm headed in cog.
thank you for a wonderful time

your friend,
Radha J